I am a real live tech support person. And I live in Tech Support Hell. SAVE ME!!!! UPDATE: I have been saved!
Wanted: Techs in Support Hell needed to help keep this blog alive!
This lady just called me and I was amazed at her idiocy (that's really saying a lot, too). She told me she had just got a "splitter" for the 2nd computer she had in the house. I asked her if it was a hub or a router.
Ms. Customer: A hub, I guess.
Me: There's a big difference, but any way, I can't help you with your home network.
Ms. Customer: I just want to make sure I have it hooked up correctly. I have the hub connecting the cables to the modems and from there it goes to each computer.
Me: Wait a second. Did you say cable modems?
Ms. Customer: Yes
Me: You are not allowed to have more than one modem per household on our network.
Ms. Customer: Oh. What do you mean "not allowed?"
Me: The system will only allow one modem per household unless you have a business account.
Ms. Customer: Oh, yeah, that's what they said.
Me: Who said that?
Ms. Customer: The person I spoke with a few weeks ago. She said it wouldn't work. I didn't know it wasn't allowed.
Me: So, the rep told you that you couldn't do that, but you thought you would try it anyway?
Ms. Customer: Well, it worked for a little while...
Me: Maybe because he was a previous customer?
Ms. Customer: No he wasn't.
Me: What, he just had a cable modem in his closet?
Ms. Customer: mumbling in the background...
OK, so what do i need to get if I want to have more than one computer use the Internet?
Me: A router or a hub, but I can't help you with setting them up and if you have a problem connecting then we will ask you to connect direct to the modem.
Ms. Customer: OK, thanks.
Need to know how to set up Outlook Express, with screen shots and everything? You will need to know your email address, the username and password for the account, and the incoming and outgoing email servers from your ISP.
Customer was having trouble getting an IP address from us and in the course of troubleshooting he said:
Mr. Customer: I run a technology company. I am telling you that just so you know you are not talking to your average moron.
Me: So, what are you? An above-average moron?
Mr. Customer: Heh, heh, yup, I am.
Me: Do you have a firewall on the computer?
Mr. Customer: (A very enthusiastic) Yup! (an even more enthusiastic) I have three of them!
Me: Why do you need 3 firewalls?
Mr. Customer: I don't want anyone getting into my stuff!
HAHAHAHAHAHA
This is a guy also had Bonzi Buddy for his homepage as well as tons of other spyware installed on the computer... Sheesh! When will people learn?
